Thursday, April 3, 2008

Sailing & Money

Sharemarket Theory for Sailors ©

My dear chap,

A lot of chaps are struggling ever since Upton-Smyth paid Lagonda's Child's fuel bill after the sojourn Med-side for the Thames 24 Europeans without first telling the World Bank. The Pimms account coming in the same week broke the camel's back and world equities have been in a tizz ever since.

Now given that owning a sailboat is about as financially reckless as one can get, it follows that sailors, though curiously wealthy are financial nincompoops under the surface. It is therefore in the interests of the sport's survival that I contribute some wisdom on the topic of portfolio theory in parlance easy for sailors to understand: -

So imagine, if you can, that a yacht race starts with all the yachts hitting the line right on the 'gun' close hauled on starboard. Gradually the yellow boat in the middle pulls ahead and you notice the crew have trimmed the sails better. That's an opportunity to back management - buy yellow! Shortly later, the whole fleet heads 5 degrees as the wind goes left. That's gives an advantage to the left hand boat, but it's too late to buy 'red' - the shift has already happened. And equally its to late to sell 'green', in the left, - they've already lost and all you are doing is locking in the loss. But if 'green' tacks while the rest of the fleet hold on in anticipation of the breeze backing left even more, then there is a chance that 'green' is now cheap if the wind reverts to its original direction.

Therein is the essential dilemma confronting both sailors and investors; - knowing whether a 'shift' is permanent or temporary.

You back green just as everyone else has given them up for dead. You are banking on the wind reverting right and green tacking back to port to cross ahead of the entire fleet.

But instead, the wind continues to go left? Green is hopelessly behind having sailed far away from a permanent header - go back to the marina, wait for next week? But in life the race never stops. Up at the front, 'red' is well into the progressive left shift and well ahead of yellow. You're chuffed at your star performer, (your had a secret 'flutter' on red), when suddenly yellow tacks and shiver your timbers (and margin lending account) they are on the lay line while 'red' is sailing ever onward greedily basking in being left hand boat in a permanent left shift (and forgetting to keep a watch on both the economy and the opposition - they are off buying a corporate jet!). Luckily you also had a little wager on yellow as a mid-fleet 'hedge' and suddenly its outperforming 'red', your best pick.

As the breeze starts to die across the course you pride yourself that notwithstanding your best pick is being upstaged by your hedge, you are first and second. But what's this? In the lighter winds the tidal flow is taking its toll and Roger you senseless if 'green' hasn't emerged ahead at the first mark having hugged the shallows near the headland - if only you hadn't sold!

On the run, one of the bigger boats has come from behind and casts a wind shadow that negates all the hard work of the 'small caps' trimming and picking the wind up the beat, and as it glides majestically through the fleet you abandon the 'colours' and opt instead for sheer size - always a fair bet - until, in the fallen tide, it runs aground on Arthur Andersen sandbank near the bottom mark.

Cutting your losses, but determined to eclipse the humiliation you launch yourself holus bolus onto 'green' whose sheer audacity has made a lasting impression on you.

You preen as green again heads far inshore to escape the tidal stream, but only to sweat in horror as the tide changes and in a dying breeze red and yellow's sails fall limp but are swept toward the mark in the now-favourable tidal stream.

By the rounding it is a two boat race, yellow, who has done nothing fancy, and red who has gone form hero to zero and back. With your now-diminished wager, you back red to 'pull it off' and are cautiously optimistic as they run a slightly 'hotter' angle toward a gently filling breeze while yellow hold deep waiting for the breeze to come to them.

Red are looking famous and you are basking in the admiration of Upton-Smyth's nieces when the unthinkable happens - red has put themselves dead upwind from the finish while yellow have held steadfastly on lay line to the pin. Yellow are going to cross ahead of red who is still two light air gibes from finishing!

So basically its all there; - wind shifts are no more predictable than price movements, the tide is central bank policy (never in equilibrium but always aiming for it), the bottom of the sea is errant auditors, the helmsman is the managing director, the trimmers are 'line' management while the bowman is chairman of the 'bored'. Yachts are companies (or the shares in them) as distinct to the buoys which, like cash deposits, never actually go anywhere). But most importantly, the finish line is your wife and Upton-Smyth's nieces are the stock brokers!

So there you have it, as much as everyone will mock you for having a 'yellow streak', your wife will adore you for it - and she will be there long after Upton-Smyth's nieces have abandoned you for the next crystal ball gazer.

Now on another matter - you'll be pleased to know the whole cunnalinghi affair has blown over so to speak. Of course I'd like to say it was down to my Shakespeareanesquue skills in the latest edition but truth be known a checkout filly put the whole thing to bed when she related to Upton-Smyth's good lady that cunnalinghi left a rather unpleasant taste. Thankfully the women's auxiliary went straight back to rewriting the Beijing welcome banquet menu on a Chinese theme. (They still believe cunnalinghi to be Spanish root vegetable - from down near the bottom). Committee most impressed though, with my grasp on meteorology and dynamic fluids and they've created a coaching/mentorship spot with the British Olympic squad. In my own interests actually as some I've selected put in an awfully poor showing at last week's selection regatta - young Upton-Smyth if I can be perfectly blunt!

I fear that in coaching like the sharemarket, history is doomed to repeat!

Truly truly,

Sir Walter Bard-Arse III
Magazine Editor
Chairman of House
Chairman of Rules
British Olympic Selector RYA
British Olympics Coach
Royal Mega Club and Sailing
Cowes, England. ©

04/02/08

Monday, March 24, 2008

J/24 Easter Regatta Recap

Columbia Sailing Club was the venue for this past weekend's J/24 racing. The 3-day Easter regatta saw 30 J/24s from all up and down the East Coast and Great Lakes. Friday's conditions were extremely light, and the fleet only completed one race.
We awoke to nice breeze Saturday morning, ranging from 8 to 12 knots for most of the day. Due to the light air friday and the possibility thereof on Sunday, the race committee decided to pack in as many races as possible. 5 races, 7 1/2 hours, and 12-14 beers later, we finished the day ready for some BBQ.
The forecast for Sunday proved to be about as accurate as a Miss Cleo reading, and Sunday morning saw a nice 14 knot westerly and two nice races to finish the regatta.

Friday's light air was a good thing, as Thursday night's festivities included a stop at Billy Ray's barn. A local legend at Columbia Sailing Club, Billy Ray brought out the big guns--in the form of his "Slovakian Moonshine." No doubt whipped up in a bathtub behind the barn, this putrid concoction has the nose of corn-flavored diesel fuel and a consistency not unlike fermented battery acid. Friday morning's hangover was painful even by Regatta standards, and had their been more than 1.1 knots of breeze, I would have probably sworn off drinking forever again.

One interesting feature of the event: Chris Fortin shared his Kattack system with the Fleet. Kattack is a GPS driven system that monitors the position of each boat at any given time on the race course. It tracks realtime position, heading and speed, thus enabling each boat to see in great detail when and where the rails fell off the track for each race.

As to our performance: I will only say this.

Not good. Not at all good.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

X to C. No, not like the drug.

This weekend was the annual "X to C" regatta at Lake Norman. I can think of several adjectives to describe my mental state during the event, and ecstasy is not one of them.

Racing was cancelled today due to tornadoes. So, fiancee and I went to go look for wedding bands today. So, it literally took an act of god to drag me to the mall.

Show you how smart I am: I make the following comment when asked about the size of the ring she chose:

"Yeah, since I sail a lot, I probably should get it slightly large. You know, so that it's easy to take off."

That didn't go over too well...

Saturday, March 15, 2008

You're an Idiot

In response to a skipper who requires his crew to sign waivers before boarding his boat:

Obviously, there's no document that you can draw up that will protect you if you're high on angel dust and stab your trimmer in the shin with a marlinspike. A carefully crafted "express assumption of risk" statement won't help you if you're 17 beers deep at the helm of your J/105 and run into a well-lit police vehicle. On land.

That said, the reality of the situation is that, Yes, having your crew or guests sign a properly drafted document could very well limit your liability as an owner, including your liability for negligent conduct, but only in the rarest of circumstances. In the end, I see the limited protective value as such that it is certainly not worth the expense/effort/prick factor to have one drafted & implemented, and I wouldn't advise my clients to have one. And, If one were presented to me by some officious boat owner, I'd probably offer to show him how to self-adminster a colo-rectal examination with a couple of wadded up pieces of paper.

The document in question is called an "Express Assumption of Risk." The doctrine of assumption of risk basically says that when a person knowingly and voluntarily chooses to engage in course of conduct (i.e. sailing) that carries a reasonably forseeable risk of harm, and he or she suffers the type of harm, the agent causing that harm shall not be responsible, even if the agent was in fact negligent. In states that recognize it, it is an "absolute bar" to recovery, meaning that if it applies, the plaintiff can recover nothing. Sounds like a great idea--couldn't hurt, anyways, right?

Most courts generally uphold express assumptions of risk when the Plaintiff's conduct is clearly voluntary and the risks are reasonably forseeable, like engaging in dangerous sports like sailing. So, chances are, if your bowman accidentally beans your trimmer with the spin pole during a gybe, and your trimmer sues either you or your bowman, your trimmer won't be able to recover squat. But, the thing to understand is that the above is likely the case even if he hasn't signed anything. A signed express assumption of risk is excellent evidence that the Plaintiff knew the risks, but it's not a slam dunk.

And, contrary to what almost everyone thinks--it's not without risk. A poorly drafted or overreaching document may be disregarded alltogether by the court. The other risk is practical; if the case goes to trial, it will end up making you look like a giant rectum to a jury that may have otherwise sided with the innocent owner.

The doctrine has been narrowed in recent years. In an effort to avoid precluding claims, courts have defined "inherent risks" very narrowly, leading to some dumb rules: apparently, getting hit by a golf ball is not an "inherent risk" of playing golf. And, "gross negligence," a mushy concept, and willful/wanton conduct are always outside the scope of forseeable risk, meaning that you can recover if the conduct transcends garden variety negligence, even with a signed agreement.

Here's some other news: If you get one, everyone on your boat will hate you, assuming they do not already. Ain't worth it, unless, like my skipper, you couldn't give two shits.